So, if you have 4 kids already, and 2 adults, and you plan on adding 2 more kids, that gives you 8 passengers total. Interesting note: most minivans and large SUV's built in the last 15 years max out at 7 passengers. This includes our current family car, a 2001 Honda Odyssey.
And by 7 passengers, I mean 7 seatbelts. This is the Era of Seatbelts, and everyone in the car must wear them. No more rolling around in the back of the car like so many McDonald's wrappers, like we did when I was a kid. No more running up to the front to scare the driver (sorry Mom), no more hiding on the floorboard and feeling the heat through the floormat, no more lying on top of the middle row seat to roll back when the car starts from a light.
Ah, the contusions.
As a parent, though, I love seatbelts. If they made 5-point harnesses for normal cars, I'd get those as an option. And so, if I'm gonna put 8 persons into an automobile, I'm gonna need 8 seatbelts to go with it.
Aye, but there's the rub. Guess what seats 8 folks (or more) very nicely? A van. And guess what kind of vehicle my lovely bride has forbidden from ever darkening her driveway. Ditto. So no vans.
Which leaves us minivans or SUV's. There are 8 passenger SUV's; Honda (dear, beloved Honda) even has one, the Pilot. But the Pilot has about 15 cubic inches of cargo space behind the 3rd row, enough to bring home one (1) frozen pizza, and possibly the receipt. No good for trips, camping, or the inevitable stop at the grocery store on the way home from Church. So the Pilot is out.
The Suburban seats 8, but it's made by GM. I like my cars to actually run without monthly trips to the mechanic, so GM products are out, too. Ditto Ford, Mazda, Chrysler/Dodge. I also like my cars to last more than 5 years, so that rules out lots of other folks too.
How about the Honda Odyssey? The newer models (2004+) have an optional 8th seat, but it's teensy-weensy. If Sam continued in his current practice of not eating anything at all at any time, he might be able to sit in that tiny seat for another two years. So, Odyssey is out. And there was weeping and gnashing of teeth.
So that really just leaves the Toyota Sienna, which started seating 8 folks, as an optional package, with the 2004 models. This is probably what we'll do.
In a year. When and if we actually need it.
You see, I browsed Consumer Reports, joined online chat groups about family cars, and called Toyota and Honda dealerships to get info about a car that I might need. One year in advance. Just in case.
Lest you worry about the state of my psychological well-being, I'd like to note that I did the same thing each time I found out we were pregnant. And it usually worked out fine. Except this time I've got even more time, so I won't feel as rushed. That extra 3 months or more will really help.
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Baby Steps
As in What About Bob?, not as in "Hey! We're getting a baby!" Bah. Me with my double-meaning titles. Such confusion.
Anyway, last night was our first official meeting in the whole adoption process. It was the Orientation Meeting for the State Adoption Program at Bethany Christian Services. The instructor was 5-months pregnant and just off the plane from a Florida vacation, so she was a little rambly but very, very nice.
Ours was not the only meeting there that night. There was also an orientation class for BCS's International Adoption (Bethany also does Infant Adoption, Foster Care, and something else that I can't remember). We walked into that class first (and 15 minutes early) and were impressed by the multimedia slideshow they were previewing. Then I saw the "International Adoption" and realized that we were in the wrong class. After a few minutes of wandering, we found the class for people like us: unwilling to fly to Romania and not wanting to change diapers (I've put in my 8 years of diapers, and should be rested up by the time the grandkids arrive, but perhaps not).
There was no pizza, as had been promised by someone whose name shall not be mentioned but who also has 4 sons, is interested in adoption, and who happens to live in my house. Needless to say, I was a little cranky by 7 PM and was eyeing the cookies with increasing interest.
In spite of this (I did get the cookies, by the way, and a Coke; thanks for your concern), we did learn a lot, and we signed some papers that will apparently move us to at least the next square on the board.
Here's what we learned:
Just so you don't worry, we did stop by Chick-fil-a on the way home, and I was able to eat a proper dinner. But my wife promises that there'll be pizza at the training classes, which start in mid-March.
Speaking of which, we'll need babysitting. If you'd like to come over and watch our 4 boys from 6-10 PM on a Thursday night anytime from late March to early June, please consult your mental health professional and then go lie down.
Anyway, last night was our first official meeting in the whole adoption process. It was the Orientation Meeting for the State Adoption Program at Bethany Christian Services. The instructor was 5-months pregnant and just off the plane from a Florida vacation, so she was a little rambly but very, very nice.
Ours was not the only meeting there that night. There was also an orientation class for BCS's International Adoption (Bethany also does Infant Adoption, Foster Care, and something else that I can't remember). We walked into that class first (and 15 minutes early) and were impressed by the multimedia slideshow they were previewing. Then I saw the "International Adoption" and realized that we were in the wrong class. After a few minutes of wandering, we found the class for people like us: unwilling to fly to Romania and not wanting to change diapers (I've put in my 8 years of diapers, and should be rested up by the time the grandkids arrive, but perhaps not).
There was no pizza, as had been promised by someone whose name shall not be mentioned but who also has 4 sons, is interested in adoption, and who happens to live in my house. Needless to say, I was a little cranky by 7 PM and was eyeing the cookies with increasing interest.
In spite of this (I did get the cookies, by the way, and a Coke; thanks for your concern), we did learn a lot, and we signed some papers that will apparently move us to at least the next square on the board.
Here's what we learned:
- We're not talking about babies here. We're talking children 7 years old or older, although with sibling groups there may be one 7+ and one younger child. Fine with me. We skip diapers and the Terrible Twos (which last from 18 months to 4 years old, by the way).
- The kids are in the custody of DFACS, which means they've had a pretty rough time.
- This will take a while. 7 weeks of training classes. An FBI background check that currently has a waiting list of 5 months (thanks Al Qaeda). Unknown months waiting for a match, and then a 6 month, in-home Placement (i.e., go live with them and see if it'll work out; it's more professional than that, but that's the gist of it). So if all goes well, it'll take a little over a year.
- The state of Georgia apparently picks up the tab for almost everything: court fees, Bethany's fees, etc. We pay for our medical exams and drug screens. So, to those of you who live and Georgia and pay taxes, thank you very much. I'm paying crazy DeKalb County property taxes for schools we don't use, so I figure that makes us even.
- During the 6-month Placement phase, anyone who babysits the not-quite-adopted-yet child(ren) will have to have a background check on file with Bethany. My wife informed me that everyone in our babysitting co-op already has this done, but I'm dreading having to break the news to our parents. So if y'all have any felonies that we need to know about, why don't you give me a call.
Just so you don't worry, we did stop by Chick-fil-a on the way home, and I was able to eat a proper dinner. But my wife promises that there'll be pizza at the training classes, which start in mid-March.
Speaking of which, we'll need babysitting. If you'd like to come over and watch our 4 boys from 6-10 PM on a Thursday night anytime from late March to early June, please consult your mental health professional and then go lie down.
Matthew 18:5
I came across this yesterday during my Bible reading:
We've been thinking about adoption for a few years now, for a variety of reasons. First and foremost, there are kids out there who need a family. And we have a family that -- all praise, glory, and honor to God alone -- is a pretty good family. We could probably add at least two more kids into our mix without too much external adjustment (keep the same house, keep the same jobs, keep the cat, maybe a slightly larger minivan, etc.).
Second, my wife would like to have a girl (or two). Now, at first glance this seems to be a shallow want. But if you look at it, this family has a lot to offer. A girl in today's world could do a lot worse than to have a new dress every month (week? day?), be read to from the Anne of Green Gables canon every night, watch Sleeping Beauty, and have 4 karate trained brothers to protect her and her reputation.
Third and finally, we like having a big family. We have 4 kids now, and, due to a hasty and somewhat foolish medical procedure shortly after our 4th son's birth (vasectomy in haste, repent at leisure, as I always say), we are now unable to add to our family in the most commonly accepted interpretation of "go forth and increase." So that leaves adoption.
Although, to be honest, I'm not sure that we wouldn't adopt anyway. I'm a big believer in giving: the idea of handing back to God whatever it is that he has given you. He's given me this great and wonderful family, and I haven't been able to figure out how to give it back. And so, I'll offer it up as a living sacrifice instead. He'll send us someone who needs us, and who we need.
And we'll receive that child (or children) in His name, just like He said.
Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me
Matthew 18:5
We've been thinking about adoption for a few years now, for a variety of reasons. First and foremost, there are kids out there who need a family. And we have a family that -- all praise, glory, and honor to God alone -- is a pretty good family. We could probably add at least two more kids into our mix without too much external adjustment (keep the same house, keep the same jobs, keep the cat, maybe a slightly larger minivan, etc.).
Second, my wife would like to have a girl (or two). Now, at first glance this seems to be a shallow want. But if you look at it, this family has a lot to offer. A girl in today's world could do a lot worse than to have a new dress every month (week? day?), be read to from the Anne of Green Gables canon every night, watch Sleeping Beauty, and have 4 karate trained brothers to protect her and her reputation.
Third and finally, we like having a big family. We have 4 kids now, and, due to a hasty and somewhat foolish medical procedure shortly after our 4th son's birth (vasectomy in haste, repent at leisure, as I always say), we are now unable to add to our family in the most commonly accepted interpretation of "go forth and increase." So that leaves adoption.
Although, to be honest, I'm not sure that we wouldn't adopt anyway. I'm a big believer in giving: the idea of handing back to God whatever it is that he has given you. He's given me this great and wonderful family, and I haven't been able to figure out how to give it back. And so, I'll offer it up as a living sacrifice instead. He'll send us someone who needs us, and who we need.
And we'll receive that child (or children) in His name, just like He said.
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