Baby Steps

As in What About Bob?, not as in "Hey! We're getting a baby!" Bah. Me with my double-meaning titles. Such confusion.

Anyway, last night was our first official meeting in the whole adoption process. It was the Orientation Meeting for the State Adoption Program at Bethany Christian Services. The instructor was 5-months pregnant and just off the plane from a Florida vacation, so she was a little rambly but very, very nice.

Ours was not the only meeting there that night. There was also an orientation class for BCS's International Adoption (Bethany also does Infant Adoption, Foster Care, and something else that I can't remember). We walked into that class first (and 15 minutes early) and were impressed by the multimedia slideshow they were previewing. Then I saw the "International Adoption" and realized that we were in the wrong class. After a few minutes of wandering, we found the class for people like us: unwilling to fly to Romania and not wanting to change diapers (I've put in my 8 years of diapers, and should be rested up by the time the grandkids arrive, but perhaps not).

There was no pizza, as had been promised by someone whose name shall not be mentioned but who also has 4 sons, is interested in adoption, and who happens to live in my house. Needless to say, I was a little cranky by 7 PM and was eyeing the cookies with increasing interest.

In spite of this (I did get the cookies, by the way, and a Coke; thanks for your concern), we did learn a lot, and we signed some papers that will apparently move us to at least the next square on the board.

Here's what we learned:

• We're not talking about babies here. We're talking children 7 years old or older, although with sibling groups there may be one 7+ and one younger child. Fine with me. We skip diapers and the Terrible Twos (which last from 18 months to 4 years old, by the way).
• The kids are in the custody of DFACS, which means they've had a pretty rough time.
• This will take a while. 7 weeks of training classes. An FBI background check that currently has a waiting list of 5 months (thanks Al Qaeda). Unknown months waiting for a match, and then a 6 month, in-home Placement (i.e., go live with them and see if it'll work out; it's more professional than that, but that's the gist of it). So if all goes well, it'll take a little over a year.
• The state of Georgia apparently picks up the tab for almost everything: court fees, Bethany's fees, etc. We pay for our medical exams and drug screens. So, to those of you who live and Georgia and pay taxes, thank you very much. I'm paying crazy DeKalb County property taxes for schools we don't use, so I figure that makes us even.
• During the 6-month Placement phase, anyone who babysits the not-quite-adopted-yet child(ren) will have to have a background check on file with Bethany. My wife informed me that everyone in our babysitting co-op already has this done, but I'm dreading having to break the news to our parents. So if y'all have any felonies that we need to know about, why don't you give me a call.
  

So we're on our way. Adoption train's a-rollin, etc.

Just so you don't worry, we did stop by Chick-fil-a on the way home, and I was able to eat a proper dinner. But my wife promises that there'll be pizza at the training classes, which start in mid-March.

Speaking of which, we'll need babysitting. If you'd like to come over and watch our 4 boys from 6-10 PM on a Thursday night anytime from late March to early June, please consult your mental health professional and then go lie down.